You forget about a lot of things in the years since you had a baby in the house.

How much you love sleep is a biggy, as is the wet wipe paradox – the more packets you put into your household the less likely you are to be able to find one during a brown alert emergency.

It’s the unadulterated pain which the arrival of tiny new teeth create for all concerned that has reasserted itself in our parental memories this week though as our new daughter hits 7 months.

Far be it from me to call out mother and indeed father nature, but on the face of it the way us humans go about getting teeth feels pretty dumb, with milk teeth in particular causing a disproportionate amount of bother in the short time they are operational.

From around the six month mark onwards babies begin their three year long journey to push out a set of teeth that will hang about for a while before they start to fall out and are replaced by the real deal.


The process of cutting these baby teeth is termed as ‘eruption’ by medical folk and never in the field of biological jargon has one word been seen as so apt by so many.


The first series of ten or so teeth your baby cuts have the capability to cause one or all of the following: burning cheeks, red ears, high temperature, broken sleep, an urge to bite everything and everyone within reach, screams of pain as the jagged demon cuts through soft gum, cold like symptoms, drooling by the bucketful and full nappies so rancid thanks to the acidic teething saliva being produced that you feel like calling in a UN weapons inspection team to give them the all clear.


Other than trying to comfort them, there are a few things you can do to relieve the obvious pain like giving them a cold teething ring or administering the slightly Victorian looking homeopathic granules you’ll see in the chemist.


There’s next to no evidence these magical powders do any good whatsoever of course but there are parents out there who will wrestle you to the ground rather than concede it’s a load of old flowery hokum. At worst they give your teething bub something new to think about for a while once they feel them in their mouth and you get to feel a bit less useless.


Then after all the pain and the tears comes the moment when you see their toothy little grin for the first time and you wonder where your gummy little new born went.


That and who moved the wet wipes.